Silence and Waiting For News

With the advent of handheld devices and the ability to stay in touch a fingertip away managing families/friends in between briefings has become increasingly challenging.

Previously the lack of access to immediate communication with extended families meant long periods of sitting with the group while they found the space to process what was going on without the distraction of the outside world. Often this processing was made in silence, with occasional muted conversations between group members as they worked over details, or repeated their fears and worries out loud. It reduced the opportunity for misreported developments and unaccountable internet interjection.

Example

Following a response to a multiple casualty incident (MCI) each accident detail related to an assembled crowd was loudly fact checked by individuals on their phones. The location, size of cascade and poorly sourced newspaper reports were thrown out as direct challenges to the truthfulness of Incident Command.

Now the whole group may be processing their predicament individually through their own networks of contacts and playing the whole thing out on social media. This can lead to a fractured reaction across the group, with an amplified emotional response due to distant prompts, or questions, leading to constant requests to the FLO.

Silence was the only option before. Now there are countless distractions from the challenge of confronting the emotional challenge in front of them. This escape may appear to be the best way forward, particularly when the families/friends lack the experience of maturity to appropriately channel their struggle. Postponement does not resolve the issue they need to confront!

The FLO can remove themselves from the immediate scene and have a stated structure for response when they do reappear. Sitting in family/friends space and scrolling through the FLO phone is not a recommended response; as FLO you can model being focused in the moment and helping to define the atmosphere by your own calm undistracted energy.

Example

I am sure you have been talking with a wider community in order to help deal with this tragic situation. I want to encourage you all to continue to talk to each other but add a word of caution about posting, or sharing on social media. The Web can be a less than supportive partner when people are most in need of support. I want to encourage you to focus on each other in this room and make sure that you have a single story to share – this will help your family in the long run so misstatements, or misrepresentations, do not enter the dialogue down the line and lead to confusion and hurt.

I am going to be reporting back to the IC and getting an update on the mission. I need to collect some answers to the questions you have posed and get the latest news from the teams on the ground.

If you have additional questions generated from beyond this group please write them down and I will review them when I come back in 60 minutes – I will be here at 1100. Writing them down will help me be accountable and efficient as I look for responses from the IC.

At the same time if the mission is being conducted in a remote area, or after a natural disaster has destroyed the communication infrastructure, the lack of connectivity can reveal the gap in individuals coping mechanism due to their over dependence on digital access. Now they are not sure what to do without their phone!

Having a brief guiding statement from the FLO may help to direct the group how to process.

Example

This area has little coverage by cell phones and our access to Internet connections is non-existent. I recognize this is challenging – I can assist in setting you up with access to one of our landlines when you need to reach out to your family. We will have to coordinate this with the ongoing operation. I am going to head off to the IC and get an update, I plan to be back here in 45 minutes, at 1430. 

While I am gone if is ok to head outside and sit or go for a short walk. I am asking you to stay on this side of the fence for now – the compound is focused on conducting the search and will have to stop their activities if anyone wanders into the area. 

I am recommending that you take time to talk to each other as you wait for the update. I have left paper and pens here if you need to write to collect your thoughts. Remember what you are feeling is legitimate and needs no explanation to me.

Do you have anything else you need from me before I leave?